Sunday, 16 September 2018

Set your Heart at Rest

Before I start to scribble about this one, here are two pics that relate back to the previous post:

A racehorse jockey?

Hashhound Just Melios is taking a break in Eichgraben

At the hilltop on Bisambergs Senderstrasse there is a spacious carpark, suitable for a much bigger Hashcrowd than there was present on this evening (and I am talking about 35 people already). This very carpark was the site where, in the OLD days of the World's Worst, when we even had a Hashit Trophy to be given out weekly, and that very trophy which was toilet seat, was to be run over by the car of Richard Kopf Morehair (OVH) and all this happened in the presence of Smelly Cheese, another living legend of this Hash.

OUT OF NOWHERE did Smelly Cheese he reappear after too many years of AWOL and, even more remarkable, his son JJ, who was named SACRED COW some 20 years ago, also came out of his hiding, for the very first time since he received his Hash Name. Hares RootCAnal and Free Wily were giving lenghty explanations for what proved to be a very lentghty run. Running down the Senderstrasse again and off into the vineyards, followed by the end of Stammersdorf and continually further away from the carpark meant heat, dust and frustration as there was no sign of a beer- or winestop along the trail. A small drinking fountain was not enough to chase away the unreal memories from Free Willy run classics such as No Sarz on Mars in 2003, when after two hours of running, he declaimed to the pack of 60 "Well, the good news is, that the longer part of the run is behind us, it is only one more hour to go.  The bad news is that I've just got one water bottle for me and all 60 of you!"

A further long loop around the far side of Bisamberg later and it was On In to the carpark again, followed by a nearby On After at a really nice Heurigen. Pics of this run to be seen here.

Father Smelly Cheese...

...and Son Sacred Cow

Who could this be? 

Sat on their parkbench like bookends

The old friends that is. Meaning all those who preregisters to Cardinal Munks birthday run (soixant-dixieme) on another hot and sunny day a few weeks ago, way out west over there in Eichgraben.  How many where there? It must have been well over thirty freeloaders, as the Hare (duly assisted by CoHare Joystick) invited us all to wine and dine after the run (of course with copious quantities of cold beer available).

There was a food truck arriving shortly before the run start, there were fridges with stacks of beer, tables with white table-cloth were set up and off we went, the pre-run explanations were given (walkers and runners trail) and then it was off into the woods, at some point quite close to the railway tracks of the Westbahnstrecke, at another point it was deep into the forest and, on the upper end, the Hares desperately tried not to raise the tempers of a local farmers family who were cutting wood (that only worked in parts) and, eventually, passing by another farm (with no-one in sight this time) just a few piggies oinked their salute for the thirsty runners.

What followed was the beer and liquor-stop, with some tasty stuff (whisky or the like) being provided by a friendly neighbour of our Cardinal. I had not the biggest intention to run, yet still tried to folow the runners which resulted in me getting way behind everybody else. What the heck I thought, there was still Mother Superior, OVH and Just Asako in sight. Towards the later part of the run there was a village called Knagg (which 37 inhabitants, according to this source). There was no infrastructure in form of (even smallish) shops but most astounding haciendas. Very subtle and sophisticated, but hardly reachable via public transport.

Ich hau Dir eine ins Knagg, oh wait...

Getting back to the Cardinals residence (the Castel Gandolfo of the World's Worst so to say), the scene was all set for a great party. Likkmm came over from Switzerland and presented Mr. Birthday Boy with one of his old running shoes which he wore from run # who? to run # really cares?. Ice Queen and Slush Puppie provided a barrel of Salm Bräu Beer ...

Na denn Prost, dass die Gurgel net verrost'

 ... and a special reappearance of Marathon Man, who together with family moved back to Vienna was feasted, together with newly wed couple Mr. and Mrs. Pink (congratulations from my side as well!). Pics of this run can be seen here.

The lights are dimmed and once again the stage is set for you.

Back to where this man belongs! :-)

After the circle, tasty food and drinking until late. Very well done indeed!

Saturday, 8 September 2018

Quick and Dirty

Breaking up the string of regular Run Reports and such here is a short story about a Female-only run event that happened earlier today in Vienna at the Harness Racing track in the Krieau which is part of the Prater area (with our very own Hash House only a couple of kilometres away).

10 brave and merry Harriettes of the World's Worst teamed up for a 5 k event which was called the Muddy Angel Run (a charity run for Breast Cancer help and without timing), and at the allotted starting time of 10:40 AM an even merrier bunch of 6 Gents (+daughter Fallen Angel and pooch Just Melios) who served as Chaperones carried all the runners belongings, quite a few bottles of Prosecco and, in my case, a cooler full of beer, to the venue to watch the fun unfold.

An example of the fun that our ladies were to enjoy during the Muddy Angel run event

The running track was marked with pink tape and looked a little complicated to follow for the bystanders, therefore seeing our group of Harriettes at all the obstacles during the run was not possible. Nevertheless the excitement for the spectators was to witness the team spirit that was displayed, as they all waited for each other at the waterpool, the mudcrawl, the bubblefoam bath etc. and the finish line was crossed by all together. My sincere congratulations to all Harriettes who took part in this charity run, after changing and showering (cold of course) a little picnic with Prosecco and beer was had. We also met MOM after the run (out to watch his daughers run) and Molotovs Vagina, now a mother of two boys.

A truly great and inspiring occasion. Fun was indeed had by all. Prof. DDr. Felch, OVH and myself took plenty of pics and we will forward these in due course to the Moron Brothers to put them up on the Hash Photosite. Pics of this remarkable event can now be watched here and there.
And now on to the visual proof of my gibberish :-

Excitement before the start

Stop the press - who is that?

Way to go!

Fidgety Feet 

It's only Rock'n Roll but we like it

Hold on tight!

There was more water to come

Take me to the Ballgame

Everyone's a winner! 

Thursday, 6 September 2018


The string of the (Quote Hash Lash) "traditional runs" also includes our (S.Energy and my) run of the local Figurteich in Guntramsdorf (scroll down the Link to see the description), a swimming place I went to for 35 years now. Another scorching hot day gave me the envious task of setting the fastest possible way to the sumptuous Weinfest in Mödling which is yet another annual event. Age and the heat were taking their respective toll and hence it took quite a while for the walkers (most prominently Lord Glo-Balls, OVH) to get to Museumspark in Mödling, venue of the Weinfest to sponsor an already eagerly awaited round of refreshments.

Es wird ein Wein sein, und mir wern nimmer sein! 

The way back to the carpark was featured by CoHare S.Energy watering the sweating runners with our gardenhose when they were passing by our house. Before the circle started near the Figurteich some well-deserved swimming was carried out and the On After - at long last - was moved to a nearby Heurigen, the Hares favourite one I hasten to add.

For pics of this run please look here.

Ain't too proud to beg

This is the year of birthyear runs and other commemorative dates, such as 1966..., er World Cup Win for England etc. But I won't go into that, just a brief mention about the Ostrich soccer team taking a win in Wembley in my birthyear. And the man who scored two goals in that game went on to become a great kicker in the NFL in the 1970s.

Apart from these brief memories, the main aim - as always - was a free swim and a grill evening after the run. Regular Hare Tickpleaser was ably assisted by Hot Property "You know, HO helped me to set this run, of all the runs I've set up here this is the best trail" (Quote-Unquote Tickpleaser). There was no denying in enjoying a scenic run all around the Gießhübl area, starting off from the local vineyards via the nearby stone quarry, on up to the Kuhheide, a long and muddy way downhill through the forest which looped back towards and underneath a motorway bridge (A21) and back all the way to the palace of Tickpleasers. Pics of this run can be viewed here. And we are not too proud to beg to be allowed back next year.

As always, swimming and grilling ensuing.

Gießhübl forest area 

Another world's worst Hash circle

Wednesday, 29 August 2018

Action Scope

The starting point had been announced in an obscure street near the completely revamped Vienna Hauptbahnhof area (the old Südbahnhof in a former life) and without technical guidance by another obscure application on my mobile device it would have been tricky for me to find the place. What have YOU done when there was no Internet, no mobile phones, no Hash Blogs ;-), just a piece of paper with an address written on it? Of course you would have used the part of your brain cells left intact by excessive beer consumption.

Anyhow, Hares Ice Queen and Primadonna were out to spoil us with a trail leading from the Schweizergarten (not the Schweizerhaus) right into the vast space Arsenal with its Heeresgeschichtliche Museum and for a while through backroads of the 3rd and even the 10th district.

Repent you sinners! 

At some point there was a richness of motorway bridges coming from and leading into all possible directions. (Kind of a Liliputian version of Los Angeles Freeways). Naturally, the right trail was pointed right in between those roads, some with cars on, some without. "Now would Primadonna have the audacity to lead us onto the nearby Motorway?" Of course he would! Even without cars passing by it was a weird scene with the Monday evening traffic whizzing by on the A23. The explanation was that the Hares have used a motorway ramp that had been built all those years ago but had never been opened for traffic, one of the wonders of life in the Ostrich Capital. For an explanation on all this see here

Nearer my car to thee?

The end is nigh! 

Right at the end of the Motorway ramp the green area started again, showing that best laid architect's plans can lead into a void sometimes. My courage was rising at the prospect that we were getting near the lovely Böhmische Prater and a Beerstop that we've been promised (by reliable people, Prof. DDr. Felch, are you reading this?) After some more running the Böhmische Prater with its great Beer Places came up and, normal for Hashers, within 15 seconds everyone was sitting and after another 15 seconds with a beer in hand. After the beerstop it was on back through the 10th district, passing by the old Ankerbrot factory (with Eurohash memories being discussed again) and at some point the walkers trail ceased to exist as there were no marks anymore. Fair enough, the carpark was only a couple of streetcorners away. 

The Böhmische Prater in full swing 

"Sahnehäubchenschnittchenbrücke", look that on up.

 During a joyful circle in a public park not far from densely populated building blocks a police car drove by, slowly and attentive and DID NOT STOP to ask questions. We seem to be losing our radical edge, or rather we may start looking the way we are, geriatrics on the booze loose. Like I said in the circle, this run gets a five star rating from me. Hash Flash pics can be watched here

Sunday, 26 August 2018

June Moon

Right before the start of the holiday season at the end of June (for those with schoolkids, ahem) a Full Moon run in Traiskirchen was offered by Casting Couch and TwoBob. A speciality of the Thermenregion, the area to which the village of Traiskirchen belongs are the recurring wine fests beginning in June and going on in various other villages (Guntramsdorf, Mödling, Pfaffstätten, Gumpoldskirchen, Sooß) until the end of August.

No, of course there was no wine drinking stop being offered by our friendly Hares. The trail was showcasing various places of Traiskirchen and back to the carpark alongside the local waterway. The small crowd of less than a dozen was entertained during the circle by the R and A Ice Queen and Slush Puppie.

OnIn afterwards was booked at the Heurigen Karl Alphart, with wines and food to be recommended.

A piper (duckwhistler rather) at the Gates of Delirium 

Pics of this run can be watched here.

Beaver Creek

is another term in use for the annual run near the Donau-Oder Kanal which is a long way if one comes from the south of Vienna or just around the block if you heading out from this place, for instance. Justin Beaver successfully started this tradition that shines with regular BBQ and THE POSSIBILITY of swimming in the Donau-Oder Kanal, something that I have never seen taking place, mostly because of poor weather.

Bring your swimmers, mates! 

Long and flat running stretches are possible within that neighborhood (and from one year to the next there are plenty newly-built houses to admire), and the outskirts of the Lobau have been visited many a time. Neatly being split into a runners and a wa*kers trail, the run lengh did not exceed the standard of one hour. There is a Tennis club nearby the Hare's domicile, and obviously there have been complaints in the past because of the World's Worst circle noise so there was no choice left but to move the festivities even further away and into the adjacent fields. As always after the end of the circle, fine grilling and drinking until late at the JIB's house.

Pics of this run can be seen here

Sunday, 1 July 2018

Yet another Golden Great

is the annual run chez No Mercy Mistress in the 22nd district, way across the Danube river in the Hirschstetten area. Just Ruben (according to our who is also his mother the only Hasher remaining unnamed in more than 20 years) lay a trail out into the green areas neat the A 23 motorway (yes, this is very possible) and which in one way or another always seemed to touch the Hirschstettner Badeteich. After the experience of many years we all know to come here for a bit of light jogging,  as well as the swimming pool and the Barbecue afterwards.

Since the soccer World Cup is in full swing public viewing was also offered and thankfully taken by LGB, OVH, after all it was an England game on that evening. Many thanks for the hosts ever generous Hospitality.

Badeteich Hirschstetten

After the run, before the swim

Limited pudlic viewing 

Industrious and underway

On Monday June 11th S. Energy decided to host a run in Himberg, a town southeast of Vienna.  I had the pleasure to be the CoHare and after two reccies of the area we came up with a run length of 50 minutes which started right outside the local train station building and, after a short whole of admiring local shops and houses there were vast fields of green all around. And high temperatures, of course. S. Energy clevery improvised by coming up with a shortcut (walkers trail) leading along the local waterway called the Neubach. The bigger part of the pack decided to take the longer way out in the fields and the heat, and after a sharp right turn that was leading along a boundary ridge all were reunited again to tackle the last part of the trail. A well kept gothic church along the way and crossing over the Neubach again with some green spots were the visual highs and, after the circle, the OnIn had been reserved at the Gasthaus Steyrerhof. The pleasant surprise was that after initial service was performed in snails tempo, the hosts were knocking out the menus real fast. Well done and a recommendation for further visits, whenever.

P.S. My apologies to those who arrived on the train and found us gone. The delay in public transport has not been our fault. Since everyone turned up during the course of the run the flour marks must have been clear to follow.

Septic Yank not playing it cheap in the Gasthaus! 

Our pounding farter

Run theme was the departure of Wayne Fecksky and Just Debbie (who may habe received a Hash name which I forgot). The location was the oft used corner of Zelinkagasse around the corner of the U2 stop Schottentor. The special feature of the run was the re-appearance of one of the two founders of the Vindobona Hash in 1982, look here for the mention on the VH3 History page.

The run itself was another one of those all too common walking trips down and up the Donaukanal again. It should be considered to entrust a two-wheeled coolwagon to a good accompanying soul to distribute cold refreshments during exercise. A highpoint of some sorts came up at Gaußpatz in the 20th district in form of a beerstop at a newly opened sort-of supermarket. From there onwards it was OnOn through some more parts of the 20th as well as the 2nd district and eventually back to the start. Just Lan, the aforementioned founder of the World's Worst came along to the carpark and for those who knew him from way back (LGB and Cardinal Munk both OVH) it as the first encounter in person after more than 30 years.

Just Lan had been named after the circle in a small and private subcircle since, according to local Hash History, there were no Hash names used in the early days. To honor just Lan for his deeds and as an hommage to what he and Just Hans, the other founder of the VH3 had started, Just Lan from now on will be known as OUR POUNDING FARTER.  Thanks for everything and farewell to Wayne Fecksky and Just Debbie.

A well known person and OUR POUNDING FARTER.

But of course they are - WE ALL are foreigners !

Why don't you give me a call? 

Mind the Gap! 

The Southern Part

or the part south of Vindobona which comprises the Thermenregion and the Wienerwald, area of high living quality and a countless variety of Hash trails, was used by a quartet consisting of Casting Couch, S. Energy, Kuty Pi and yours truly for a run through the vineyards and up the local hill with its own microclimate, the Eichkogel.

I remember the day (Whit Monday) as a sunny and warm one, therefore we had a songstop on an elevation and a picturesque way back down towards the Windradlteich with the circle being held nearby. OnIn at the local Heurigen Baitschev with a remarkable buffet and even beer (which is not a certainty in wine places). 

Saturday, 30 June 2018

Slap it!

It is the bass guitar the title of this post is referring to. Septic Yank, best Grand Master that the World's Worst never had the pleasure to be commanded by, also happens to be an accomplished bass player in a music group called the Gang Bang Band or the Old Skool. For years we have prayed him to slap his bass guitar following the likes of Larry Graham, Marcus Miller or Darry Jones. The stereotype we (Cardinal Munk, OVH and I) would always get was "I don't do slapping because McCartney never did". Yet there is a remarkable slapping tune out there.

Fair enough of him and Merry Me to come up with an annual run at the Obere Alte Donau starting off from the end of Fultonstrasse. Walkers and runners trails were provided and three merry Gentlemen from the Worlds Worst were proof that one also can get lost on a walkers trail! Occasionally runners were spotted heading into the opposite direction, and while on the walkers trail, Slush Puppie spotted his origins once again.

Circle was held next to the Alte Donau (where are the pics to prove this, Hash Flashes?) and OnIn at the inevitable Gasthaus Birner, venue of last years Christmas Party.

Once a year

Flying Dutchman (OVH) sets a run starting from underneath the Brigittenauer Brücke, regularly followed by a barbecue. The occasion following the relaxed Drosendorf event was highlighted by a massive construction area, thereby taking away two thirds of the regular parking lots which caused impressive car park searches by non Hashing Grillmeisters as well as the brave few who did not come by public transport.

Rear Admiral Flying Dutchman, OVH 

Is there a lot to say about an area as well as a running track that has been used seemingly forever, in all four seasons it seems? The fact shines above us that we all are still able to do a bit of exercise, in whatever form and velocity. Likkmm stayed on after the Drosendorf event, Queenie and Tonto made a rare re-appearance and those who are designated herbivores (the last one I remember was My Sisters Glowing K, now lives in Germany) had a hard time at the On After which of course was the Hash Grill. Can the Dutch be funny? At least funny Dutch phrases are swirling around, let alone some Dutch courage if you are to ask your boss for a pay raise. Moronic pics about this run to be seen here.

Walking class heroes! 

Wednesday, 27 June 2018

Up there somewhere

When it was announced some time ago that the World's Worst next Hash weekend (and since the late 1990's onwards we learned to hold these events away from Vienna, to give everyone a jolly decent time and to prevent the locals from going home early if they'd fall asleep unallowed) the name Drosendorf was mentioned. At first I thought "Hang on, we've been to Melk a few years ago and Drosendorf is just a few kilometres away from Melk." Only later I realised that the Organ sizers had another Drosendorf in mind, the one that is located up in the Waldviertel and next to the Czech Border.

After a two hour drive from Vienna - and I have to admit that S.Energy and I had been asked to set the Friday evening run so we couldn't help but travel to the place in advance to reccie a bit - my initial skepticism turned into being pleasantly surprised about the beauty of both the city and the area. Mind you,  Drosendorf an der Thaya lay directly next to the Iron Curtain which meant a lot of no go area) and, after that curtain came tumblin' down, became a national park (Thayatal) on both sides of the border. Lovely indeed and much to be recommended, the locals advertise their city as the old-fashioned "Sommerfrische" and I can clearly see why.

Enough of that chatter already. Billed as the counterpoint to last years Eurohash extravaganza, a small and selected group of no more than 35 (if even) arrived mostly on time and the Warmup run started leading out through the town walls and downhill towards an early 1970s and deserted looking public swimming pool. Imagine a place with several half empty concrete pools with green slimy water inside that was open to everyone with absolutely no-one there, apart from the World's Worst crowd.

After a light jog alongside the Thaya and briefly uphill it was on alongside the town walls and eventually inside to some more lovely views, the OnIn came up in no time and the circle was held inside the Hotel Zum Goldenen Lamm.

I wanted to do the long and torturous Saturday run of 25k (announced as such) but couldn't due to a bad cold. What the heck, the walkers group had the immeasurable advantage and pleasure to ride the Reblaus Express, a local nostalgic train with the special feature of a Heurigenwagon (being served by different winemakers every week) so the overall mood was elevated when we arrived at the designated stop to commence the official walkers trail. Long and straight concrete trails, embellished by razorback enclosures (with adorable piglets) that made the way to a Heurigen where we met with runners again look like a Sunday afternoon stroll.

Enjoy yourselves 

it's later than you think

Locals Wines were sampled and typical Heurigen food (Brettljause) was had by all and after that it was a common walk back to another train station where the circle was held. The highpoints of this circle were the namings of 7 Up (Just Monika) and the elevation of MOM into the fold of the OVH (Mother Superior of the Order of the Vindobona Hash). After getting back to the hotel we left early for Vienna so no report about any evening debauchery and/or Hangovers on Sunday.  An enjoyable weekend it was, bar none.   

Weitersfeld Trainstation

No, this was not the Reblaus Express

But looked interesting nonetheless