Sunday, 15 September 2019

Penultimate Thoughts

The days are getting shorter, the Monday run period is about to end and. In a well hidden corner of Viennas 20th district, the Brigittenau, King Ralph laid another of his "see the beauty in the suburbs" run.

On Trail 

Starting from a well-hidden carpark underneath the concrete of the Handelskai road the trails's first part was a run/walk through the various Gemeindebauten of this district. When a checkpoint at the start of the Floridsdorfer Brücke was reached I feared for the worst as this is a) a rather long run/walk over this bridge and b) and even longer run/walk back, but in the darkness.

The trail continued on down, alongside the Danube (very long and very straight part) to the short songstop. 2 thirds of the pack of 20 continued on the Walkers trail, until after quite some more sightseeing through parts of the 19th and mostly the 20th district it was on back to the carpark. The circle featured the return of Bootleg Sister and Needleman, as well as Queenie and Tonto. After 45 minutes of drunken depraved singing two agents of the local law enforcement community paid a short visit. After King Ralph himself explained to them the concept of a drinking club with a running problem, they left without further ado.

And, of course, there was the shoe story, a continuation of last weeks theft of Walrus' shoes at Tickpleasers place. Read all about it in the words of Walrus, Vice GM, himself.

"Good morning Hashers,

As you may recall, yesterday's run at the Handelskai was to be the scene of a three-way shoe trade, a "handel" as the locals would have it.  I brought Tick Pleaser's Crocs, TP brought Whoppa's left-behind shoes and MoM brought my shoes that he and King Ralph kidnapped, like Richard Lionheart, at the TGIF on Friday.  My shoes were in the white plastic bag that Whoppa had put them in.

Fast forward to the circle when KR steps up and asks MoM for the plastic bag with the shoes.  MoM hands him the bag and Ralph queries "Are these the right shoes?"  MoM confirms and KR proceeds to pull out the shoes.  The shoes he pulls out are black, as they should be, but clearly are not size 47 extra-extra-wide.  None the less he calls me in the circle to drink beer from said shoes which, I point out, clearly are not my shoes.  Meanwhile, Whoppa perceives that the shoes that KR are holding are his missing shoes and attempts to recover them before they are polluted with beer.  While they wrestle over the shoes I rejoin the circle.  Ultimately Whoppa and I humor KR and drink beer from Whoppa's newly recovered shoes.  Later on KR and I drink beer from my new shoes (the twin pair to the missing ones).  The circle continues and then the police shows up but do nothing to explain how my shoes remain missing and Whoppas' shoes were in the plastic bag.

High Beers 

Since I know this chain of events have left you tortured all night, here are the details of yesterday's supply chain attack, what KR, for once appropriately, would pronounce as a "shoepply chain attack."  TP and I both arrived early for the run, at the site where KR usually meets his dealer by the looks of it, both bringing the Croc's and Whoppa's pair of shoes.  A little later MoM arrives with my shoes in the white plastic bag.  Seeing that there is parking at the site, MoM entrusts the plastic bag to a deranged older man and goes to get his car.  I see my chance and recover the bag with my shoes while the older man is inspecting the finger that just came out of his nose.  Then we run.

As the circle is forming, TP and I go to his car and switch my shoes for Whoppa's in the bag and put the bag back in the circle between the kindly old man and MoM.  MoM assumes the bag was stored safely and hands it over to KR, confirming that the bag has been stored securely all along.  The circle is more confused than usual.

All is well that ends well.  The circle ends with me holding wet shoes and socks but knowing that there is a dry pair of shoes and socks in TP's car (that MoM had brought earlier).  Whoppa has a pair of dry and a pair of wet shoes and the bag he originally put my shoes in and TP drove home with his Crocs in his car.

Questions, comments, rude noises?"

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