Yet another annual run takes place in Bad Deutsch Altenburg, hosted by Root CAnal and Free Willy. On Whitmonday, starting (intended) at 2 p.m. (was slightly later than that), Free Willy explained to the crowd of 25 that RCA and he had not prepared one, not two, but no less than three different trails, ranging from Small, Medium to large.
About ten running enthusiasts decided to take the long route, another ten souls ( including yours truly ) chose the golden middle way and the rest (the smartest I'd like to add) took the comfy walkers route that lasted no more than 30 minutes. Medium and large trails runners stayed together for the very steep ascent up the Pfaffenberg (very steep and very hot) with the reward of seeing an enormous quarry on the other side of that hill. Further on, through nettles and swarms of friendly mosquitos the trail split into the long and the medium route. We medium walkers/joggers enjoyed more scenic views and a trail leading slightly downhill again. After crossing some fields it was first back onto a dirt track, a bit alongside a road and finally the last part which was the walkers trail back to the starting point.
After a long time sitting under a shady tree, sipping away a few cold ones with the walkers the first brave heat runners arrived back and after some more waiting a long circle occured. Unfortunately I had to leave early so missed the barbeque. Take note that the Hares did their homework, as compared to previous experiences there were more than enough cool drinks available, beer and softies alike. Well done ;-)
Notable returnees included Scarlett Pimpernell and The Famous Pimpsqueak.
Upon arrival in the garden of the Hotel Trummer the circle started, Down Downs were handed out to just about everybody and after an hour of circle it was time for another OVH ceremony (Induction into the Order of the Vindobona Hash, to be given once a Hasher reaches 1000 runs). Tonight it was time for yours truly to be beaten with the Heilige Vindo Boner (a plastic hand full with plastic blood). Pics provided by Canada Dry. (Again, Moron Pics still not published).
Here is the speech in all its glory:
OVH HOLDERS
LGB, CM, BSN, MH, RAd, PDF, MS,HRE + Bearer of Heilige Vindobona JS (HVB)
PROCESSION
Enter procession with LGB first
Semi circle formed with CM, HVB and Heilige Vindobona in the centre.
INDUCTION
CM. HEAR YE , HEAR YE ,FELLOW HASHERS!:
CM: We are gathered here to commemorate a historic moment in the annals of Vindobona history. For today we will induct Karl ‘Marie Tamponette’ Siegl into the order of the Vindobona Hash.
LGB Being of unsound mind and body, the heralded Marie Tamponette is now the ninth to have reached the 1000th run plateau. We are reaching the stage when we ask who is not an OVH.
MH It is through his unbending will and determination, his blood, sweat and beers that has enabled him to obtain the heights of this great honour.
( CM will motion to the candidate that he should stand before the members )
CM Marie Tamponette you shall now kneel before the members of the OVH for the purification stage.
MT kneels
This question is directed to the throng:
BSN IS IT JUST THAT THE CEREMONY OF INDUCTION BE PERFORMED ON THIS CANDIDATE? If so, Answer IT IS JUST!
and the despicable throng will answer IT IS JUST!!!!!!!!!
CM: Candidate , When we give you the sign of the Heilige Vindobona, you shall reply “I swear’
LGB :Do you swear that you have truly not offered bribes to anyone (including me) for the position that has been conferred upon you.
RAd :Do you swear that you will maintain a pure conscience with regard to our very divine and pious hash?Answer’I swear’
HRE: Will you encourage the hashers to show their figures at the Figurteich ? Answer ‘I swear’
PDF: Despite increasing senility, will you still be able to remember more digits of Pi than Prof Dr Felch ? Answer ‘I swear’.
CM Will you always accompany Cardinal Munk at the Schweizerhaus, ready with the Red Telephone in case of emergencies ? Answer ‘I swear’
BSN Will you continue to head the Hash Haring Stats and not allow Casting Couch to get on top ? Answer ‘I swear’
MH Will you play music to us through your naval orifice using instruments defyingimagination? “I swear’”
RAd Do you swear to be a leader of the Queer Boys Choir, whatever that group maybe called in the future, as chief Chorister, or Queerister. ? “I swear’”
THE NAME
LGB We are content with the evidence given
CM In the name of the Vindobona hash and the sacred pater pivo, cleanse this candidate of his horrid wanking ways and guide him from his manic depressive drunkeness. Amen.
CM The candidate will forevermore be called ….GrandeMadame de Toilette Marie Tamponette.
The HV is handed to CM by HVB who then taps, right, then left shoulder then rubs head then passes the HV on to the other members of the OVH to do likewise.
After this is done CM says, " Arise and receive your articles of office!."
PDF, BSN, HM, HRE assist Grande Madame de Toilette Marie Tamponette with his clothing of honour
LGB and RAd then help pin on the medal of the OVH.
CM:Grande Madame de Toilette Marie Tamponette, Go forth and spread the good works of the OVH!
Open bottles of Sekt
HRE You may now pour Sekt for your favourite Harriettes, which means me.
Procession (the newest OVH first, … the first OVH)
Bend your knees
Something hit me, and it hit me HARD!
After this ceremony it was time to shower and get ready for the evening meal and the party with the commemorative motto of Woodstock - Peace, Love and Beer. An astounding number of Hashers brought along their fitting gear and the Old Skool (Gang Bang) Band that we hired for the occasion played until the wee hours. Friend and Hotel Owner Mario told me the next morning that the last guest fell asleep on one table and had to be carried to his room at 3 AM.! So much for efficient room service!
5, 6, 7, open up the pearly gates!
They're going down to Marrakesh?
Sunday - Rise and Shine - Run # 2001
After a long breakfast the Hangover which was set by King Ralph and Doctor No started at 11 A.M. A few game stops at Checkpoints were held, such as a (too) complicated (for me) free your hands from a big knot circle and a chase the Dragons tail stop a bit further on. After the better part of an hour mostly walking in sunny and nice surroundings of Neckenmarkt it was back to the Hotel and the final circle, which was ended by a rare performance of the Hash Hymn Swing Low.
My thanks to everyone who come along, helped to organize in any which way and partied with us. It was a true pleasure to go back to Horitschon. We emptied 5 barrels of beer, drank several cases of beer and wine and ate plenty and good food.Now, on to more everyday stories on regular runs here in Vindobona.
A week has passed after yet another astounding foray into an area more of the mind than the map. Surprisingly many members of the World's Worst held fond memories of our 25th anniversary weekend in 2007 in Horitschon in sunny Burgenland, with three runs and a train trolley ride of 23 kilometres, nicely interrupted by a grand bouffee during the ride. When we started to ponder a second time around one year ago, everything seemed to fall into place quite nicely. The owner of the hotel we stayed, the wonderful Hotel Trummer in Hortischon, remembered us becaucse of the "unusual big group size" (we were 93 back than, a little over 80 this time). Prebooking the train trolleys at their head office in Oberpullendorf (which we did 12 months ago, together with the hotel booking) was a piece of cake. Everything there was left to find and do/design was a motto, T-Shirts plus logo and two Masthead Meetings, one in November last year and one a few weeks ago in May.
And now, on with the account.
Hash Wine for Hash people
Friday evening - After the rain - Run # 1999
S.Energy, Fallen Angel, Casting Couch, Two Bob and yours truly went down to Burgenland one day early, shamelessly taking profit of an extra public holiday and having a final talk with our friend Mario, the hotel owner about beers and such. On the Friday the sunshine started and the rain and the wind ceased. After the registrations (with the usual number of latecummers) a short run started that was set by S. Energy, Fallen Angel and myself. We made a loop around the town of Horitschon, well known for its Red Wines (Blaufränkisch!) and arrived back at the hotel after 45 minutes for the first circle of the weekend. I was happy to meet up with friends whom I haven't seen in twenty years (Gwana and Frau Brau) and was delighted to see the steady number of visitors, our special mates from Zagreb, Brussels, Newcastle, Hannover (Afterglow, Rollin'Stone + 2 kids and 1 grandmother) and quite more from various chapters. The evening buffet was tasty and plentiful and a little music to entertain a few dancers was played. The evening ended not too late, given the necessary early start on Saturday morning. (Pics were made and provided by Bull's Eye). Tons of our own Moron Pics to be published when they are ready, link will be added then.
In the beginning
Out on the trail
Gong it out!
Saturday - Groovy Train - Run # 2000
Breakfast started early, two buses came and picked us up at 9 o'clock and left us out again at Langental. From this relatively small place located somewhere in the middle between Horitschon and Oberpullendorf there was a choice between a 12 k runners trail, set by Rear Admiral Flying Dutchman, OVH and Prof. DDr. Felch, OVH and a 6 k walkers trails, set by Casting Couch and TwoBob. There was a given time for us to get to Oberpullendorf train station - 12 o 'clock - yet both the walkers and the runners arrived at the main square in Oberpullendorf where there is a bandstand well in time to give the locals a performance of Napoleon XIV'S 1966 hit "They're coming to take me away!".
The World's Worst Hash Choir
And they're coming to take me away, HA-HAAA!!
After this short interlude it was on to the Trainstation, waiting for the cool drinks to arrive, and a short explanation as to what the train trolley ride is all about was given. We were on one of the first trolleys and had the pressing pleasure of a few well motivated trolley crews that came right behind us. Obviously these people had no intention to drink in peace and enjoy the scenerey, rather it was a crazy race for the better part of the train track. After rail kilometre 18 or so it was time for a lunch stop. Friend and Hotel owner Mario provided cool drinks (again) and a pleasant variation of salads and some meat stuff.
Off they go!
Somewhere along the track
Lunch stop
Resting trolleys
After an extended rest for all, the trolleys were heaved back on track and it was on to the Horitschon train station. To be continued in the next post.
Many years ago, while we lived in Paris and ran with all three Hashes of the Paris area (the other two being the wonderful Fointainebleau H3 and the likewise great Saint Cloud H3) a non-limerick came up after a run that went like this:
There once was a young girl from Bude
Who went for a swim in the lake
When a man in a punt
stuck an oar up her ear
And said "You can't swim here, it's private".
Smelly Cheese, a legend of the World's Worst Hash responded to this piece of art with the following, amongst others:
There was a young lady from Bude
Who went for a swim in the nude.
She went out in a punt,
And fell out at the front,
And was horribly mauled -- by a duck!
Somewhere up on Bisamberg
If you're interested in Limericks you can quite easily find other examples out there. I am bringing this up as this post deals with an area that is mostly used by St. Norman, OVH (this time with Rowed Runner) which is the backside of the Bisamberg in Viennas 21st district. Starting off from the carpark near the local cemetery it is immediately into an area rich with vineyards, cobblestone roads, winehouses(Heurigens), beautiful running paths, scenic outlooks...., you name it.
This sign of an underground station has nothing to do with this post ;-)
There is not much that Hares can do wrong in these surroundings. Tonights Hares were no exception, with bringing the trail all the way further uphill (thereby avoiding the well known Stammersdorfer Kellergasse with all its Heurigens) until the carpark Senderstrasse was reached. Which is were many a Hashrun was started in the past. From there onwards came the locally wellknown any my favourie part of the run which is downhill the cobblestone street of the Jungenbergstrasse with more spectacular views. One does not need to go to Ibiza. Stay with the World's Worst Hash and be rewarded with copious Down Downs. Towards the end, back to the carpark followed by a regular circle and the On After at the nearby Gasthaus Weinbeisser. (They say halfprice food on Mondays which it isn't). But good food nonetheless.
Mehr als 200 Teile aus Plasten und Elasten, natürlich von Pneumant
Another recent attraction (of many, I confess) was the annual Wiener Beerfest in the centre of town. Beerlovers came sample the products from more than 30 breweries. Very much recommended. Annually in the second half of May.
For the umpteenth and certainly not the last time in this lifetime Rear Admiral Flying Dutchman, OVH started his annual trail from the Brigittenauer Brücke, tweaked in between the Motorway A 22 and the green of the nearby Donauinsel. Another 20 or more Hashers showed up and, after the prerun explanations if was on over the Brigittenauer Brücke into the Donaupark on the other side.
Having run often through the quiet roads where all these posh houses (and a few, well, more old-fashioned ones can be seen) I still tend to get lost there. Mirthfully the shores of the Alte Donau came up and as this is an area where many a Hashrun has been set in the past I could make out at least three if not four areas that were used as carpark on other runs. Not counting in the Gasthaus Birner on the udder side of the Alte Donau, the Gastbaus being our annual host for the World's Worst Hash Christmas Party.
The backtrail consisted of more quiet roads and the beginning of the Donaupark itself. When Pope John Paul II visited Vindobona in 1983, he held a public church service in the Donaupark that 300.000 people attended. There is still a large metal cross to commemorate that. A little while later it was on back to the carpark, circle and Barbeque afterwards. The main feature of the circle was the return of Cardinal Munk, OVH after heavy illness. The Hash Grill, being kept and guarded by the Hare since ... I can't remember anymore was forgotten at the Grill area and gone the next day when Rear Admiral FD, OVH came back for a search and rescue mission. Would that be worth an extra Down Down the next time round?
The first Monday evening run of this year, as always and traditionally starting off from the wonderful Grüß Di a Gott Wirt (the founding place of the Vindobona Hash in 1982) was a bit overshadowed in the truest sense by heavy clouds, the occasional rainshower and something which I have never seen on this hilltop - Viennas highest elevation point at 542 metres - namely mist.
With Cardinal Munk, OVH still on rehab it was Tickpleaser who came to the rescue, offering his time and car and his Hash catering services plus Casting Couch (volunteered herself to take a bus to its terminal and then walk 40 minutes thru the forest, thereby getting lost and arriving a few minutes late) - danque cheun to you both. Furthermore it was our old friends from the Paris, Saint Cloud and Fontainebleau Hashes Spicy Meat Balls and Roundabout whom we haven't seen in many years. They, as houseguests and great Hashers, gladly assisted as well, so in the end a team of five laid the trail, carried on up the bubbly stuff and prepared the stage for the songstop.
In spite of the weather (thanks RA!) 20 Hares plus us five hounds made their way up the hill to the Hermannskogel with its landmark, the Habsburgerwarte and Spicy Meat Balls and I barely got up and had the prosecco ready when the first runners already arrived.
Me LIKEY!
The Cups were filled and handed out by Holy Roamin' Empress, OVH personally to all arrivals. After toasting to ourselves (37 years of VH3!) it was time for the theme song, a British hit from 1966 that is very likely to be performed on the weekend of our 2000th run again.More of that at the end of this post. After drinking and singing it was on downhill to the circle were visitors were introduced, Beanman (the only remaining survivor of run # 1!) was celebrated and at long last it was time for the nearby OnAfter. Stefan, the owner of the Grüß Di A Gott Wirt always passes on his weekly closing day and opens up just for us. Thanks for that!
